Becky's Blurps

What I wish you understood.

2007-02-26T15:25:44Z

Ok I want to know does any one truely care to understand me or to know who I really am on the inside or do you just want me to keep going on as this happy go lucky girl where nothing is ever wrong and she is always happy? I wear a mask I know I do. I can't help it is what I have always done. and I don't think you would understand me even if you knew the real me.. when ever I do try and show my real self every one is like you are being so emo quit! and I wish I could let you all see that I am not a happy go lucky person I am depressed pretty much all the time I just never let you guys see it because you don't that is who I am. not like any of you will read this any way. this I guess is me trying to let you know I am so tierd of pretending... Never Mind forget I said any thing I am just being stupid sorry for this pointless blog. I guess this is what I get for having a deep discussion about who I really am to a friend I don't think he understood either. random question I leave you with. Do you think I am happy kid or emo?

some things I have writtin

2007-02-21T15:23:24Z

Here are a few poams I have writtin in the past couple years tell me what you think...
Alone and scared
wishing to be some where safe.
Away and concealed
from the light of day.
Wanting to harm myself,
but not wanting to become another victim.
I just want to release my pain.
Wanting to break free and become something more,
But i can't.
Its like i have chains of shame keeping me down.
I need help to unlock these chains,
But i still end up alone and scared
crying in the dark cause there is no one here.
By Rebecca E. Overton

I am standing in a crowded room
I start to scream
No one turns they ignore me
I run away as fast as I can
And I run into a face less man
He takes my hand, we walk along
The sky goes dark and gray
He fades away
I am left there alone
Heart aching and sad
I see a cliff its not that far
I fun to it standing on the edge
Looking down on the crashing waves
I jump, I drowned then I end up
Right back in the same room I ram from.
By Rebecca E Overton

I sit in the dark alone, ashamed, hopeless
And I think to myself is there no hope
In this world doesn't any one care, do I have to be alone
Scared and shivering in the dark painful memories come back to me.
I cry, wheep, sadend
I curl up in a ball for a moment then i run fast away to hide
I run into the person who gave me those memories
I grab him hold him with joy in a big hug
Then i remember what he did to me i kick him to the ground
And beat him then I run onto the woods
Curl into a ball under a tree and cry, shaking, screaming with anger
I grab a stick and sharpen, I cut my wrist and I throw the stick
And tend to the wounds which i have inflicted to myself
I cry, wheep in the dark with the painful memories that tount my dreamsAnd I die never to see the light of the world again.
By Rebecca E Overton

Alone but not afraid
lost but not far
I can see it at the end
waiting for this hellish void to end
stuck in the middle not able to move
there but not seen
known but not appreciated
heard but not lisened too
beauty unknown to the world
waiting to be released from these shakles
waithing for this hellish void to end.
By
Rebecca e. Overton

so yeah you can tell me what you like if you want.

Tag

2007-02-20T15:54:03Z

Ok so I was told I have to list seven songs that I am listening to at the momment so here it goes.
1. here in your arms- Hellogoodbye
2. sweet dreams-Eurythmics
3. simple and clean-Utada
4. I am in heaven when you kiss me- ATC
5. Diary of Jane- Breaking Benjermin
6. I just died in your arms- Cutting Crew
7. Around the world(la la la)- ATC

Ok I have no one to tag cause they all taged me so I am tagging the back Danni and Meagan

R.I.P Mr. Morrison

2007-02-15T20:42:55Z

R.I.P Mr. Morrison

Hey Everybody,

As many of us know that went to Castleberry High School on this day February 15, 2005 Mr. Morrison died. We know how it happened but we don't know why, it could of been his pain and suffering from his poor health at the end or possibly the medication he had to take who knows but although it is sad and still hard even after 2 years of his passing on this day for many of us at least we know he is in a better place, looking out for us, and still helping us out in some ways each day.

I can remember that you could always go up to his classroom and ask if he could help you out with some History assignments or tell him what was wrong if anything was on your mind and he could try to give you advice and make you feel better about yourself or the situation. He made learning fun just by telling us some of the things that he had seen and went through like in the Great Depression, Vietnam, John F. Kennedy (JFK), and of course Richard Nixon (Tricky Dick he called him).

His stories about those times and others were fun to hear and just seeing him trying to use the computer correctly was funny since he would talk in different lanuages to the computer when he got upset at it. Who can forget Mr Morrison's friend Tony, the ghost that he says was always in the corner of the room, listening to some great music from either the radio or his collection of cds during class, and last but not least his disliking/hating of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

He was not only just a good teacher but he was a great friend, good mentor, someone who was like a part of your family and also a little kid at heart. We all do miss him and wish he was still around but although he is not here in person anymore he is still with us in our own memories, thoughts, and and heart.

R . I . P MR . MORRISON

ahh got to love random discussions.

2007-02-06T16:50:32Z

Hey all,
so lets see this is new to me seeing as I have never had a live journal ever in my life. so this is pretty cool. So lets see I am sitting in the computer lab in the Ryan building on McMurry campus just typing something random into this box so that way I can get on with being able to put up discussion topics. one thing I would like to say is I some times get the feeling that my boyfriend is mad at me or wants some one else... is this bad? so I am going to put on up right now. so here is my starting discussion for all of you if you would like to reply to it.

This has to do with something my friend wanted to know about peoples spiritual quests and he wanted people’s opinions and things they are generally curious about. And there is my answer to question he asked. tell me if you agree or not or something that is a pressing, interesting, confusing, fascinating, compelling, or otherwise driving spiritual question. Then the biggest problem you have with Christianity. This could be about the faith itself, the church, its history, those who claim to follow it, doctrines, and any aspect of Christianity. Both Christians and non-Christians alike can respond

So here is mine… I have something that confuses me and that is why is it when one falls away from the grace of God they can never seem not matter how hard they try get back into his grace? Yes you get back in to it but you can never reach the same spiritual enlightenment that you had once had.

Ok my biggest problem with Christianity is they say they want to stand out amongst men but at the same time they are trying to conform the world. How can one stand out and be conformed at the same time. For example pressing their faith on to some one else makes it to were that person conforms. How is it if they want to stand out so bad they work to conform every one to them? To me that is not really standing out it’s a type of conformism.

so think on that and I will give you more things when they come to mind. if you go to mcmurry and are in wittemor ethics this is also on our forums to reply to.